Ep. 457 Faith, Fitness & Grit: How to Live with Purpose with Todd Durkin

Today, I am delighted to connect with a personal friend and colleague, Todd Durkin. Todd is the CEO and Co-founder of Impact-X Performance, a fitness and coaching franchise featuring faith, fitness, recovery, and life coaching, and he motivates and inspires people daily through his inspirational keynote speeches, books, podcasts, and franchise. 

Todd and I went to middle school together, so our conversation today is personal in addition to being inspirational. We explore the role of faith and family, looking at the benefits of sports, the importance of vision boards, the value of motivation, and transforming passion into purpose. Todd also discusses his philosophy, which centers on mindset, habits, and routine, shares his evening and morning routines, offers his take on big, hairy, audacious goals, and explains why challenges and adversity are crucial for growth. 

Todd is one of the most inspiring, thoughtful, and intentional voices on social media today, and I have no doubt you will find this conversation as valuable as I did.

IN THIS EPISODE YOU WILL LEARN:

• Being raised in a blue-collar town shaped Todd's values.

• Significance of having a strong sense of family and community

• The challenges Todd faced led to his personal growth

• Role of faith and divine guidance in overcoming challenges

• Morning and nighttime routines, quiet time, journaling, and prayer 

• Addressing mental health issues and supporting others who are struggling

• How coaches and mentors help people grow and achieve their goals

• Why we must set big, bold, and exciting goals and continuously challenge ourselves

• Todd shares his philosophy on winning each day and overcoming personal struggles

• How champions get made during tough times 

Bio: Todd Durkin

Todd Durkin is the CEO & co-founder of IMPACT-X Performance, a fitness & coaching franchise featuring faith, fitness, recovery, & life coaching. There are currently 7 locations around the U.S., with rapid growth & expansion plans for 2025. Todd is also a 2-Time Personal Trainer of the Year, recipient of the Jack LaLanne Award for Lifetime Achievement, Canfitpro International Presenter of the Year, has been on the prime-time show NBC STRONG, and he is someone who motivates and inspires people daily through his inspirational keynote speeches, books, podcast, and franchise. He lives by the mission to “Be the LIGHT & create IMPACT.”

As the original founder of Fitness Quest 10 in the year 2000, a world-class gym in San Diego, Todd has trained many current and past NFL, MLB, and UFC athletes, including Drew Brees (22 years), LaDainian Tomlinson, Reggie Bush, Aaron Rodgers, Darren Sproles, Jordan Love, Brett Rypien, Tony Gwynn Jr., Stephen Strasburg, Chris Young, UFC fighter Mike Chandler, and a host of other active and retired athletes. 

Todd has authored six books, including Coaching Greatness, Get Your Mind Right, True Strength, What’s Next?, the WOW BOOK, and The IMPACT Body Plan. His podcast, The Todd Durkin IMPACT SHOW, has reached over 1.5 million people and is rapidly growing. Todd’s Mastermind business & life-coaching programs have existed since 2007, and he and his team have coached thousands of entrepreneurs and business owners to new heights. His “Todd Durkin IMPACT Life-Coaching Certification” program, founded 1.5 years ago, has 67 certified life coaches, and he offers life-coaching inside his IMPACT-X Performance franchise, as well as other business owners, entrepreneurs, and high-performers who desire even more success and significance.

Lastly, Todd is popular on social media and delivers daily messages on his Instagram, Facebook, YouTube, and TikTok.  You can follow him on IG at @ToddDurkin or check him out on his website at www.ToddDurkin.com.

Todd has been married to his wife Melanie for 24 years, and they have 3 kids (Luke 22, Brady 20, and McKenna 17).

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“There is a lot we can't control, but I look back and see that everything happened for a reason.”

-Todd Durkin

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Connect with Cynthia Thurlow  

• Follow on Twitter

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• LinkedIn

• Check out Cynthia’s website

• Submit your questions to support@cynthiathurlow.com

Connect with Todd Durkin

• On his website

• Instagram and other social media: @ToddDurkin

Transcript:

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:00:01] Welcome to Everyday Wellness Podcast. I'm your host, Nurse Practitioner Cynthia Thurlow. This podcast is designed to educate, empower and inspire you to achieve your health and wellness goals. My goal and intent is to provide you with the best content and conversations from leaders in the health and wellness industry each week and impact over a million lives.

[00:00:29] Today, I had the honor of connecting with friend and colleague Todd Durkin. Todd is the CEO and co-founder of IMPACT-X Performance, a fitness and coaching franchise featuring faith, fitness, recovery and life coaching. He's someone who motivates and inspires people daily through his inspirational keynote speeches, books, podcast and franchise. He's also a personal friend and he and I went to middle school together. So, today's conversation is both personal and inspirational. 

[00:00:58] We spoke about the role of faith and family, the value of sports and lessons, why vision boards are so important, the value of motivation and passion to purpose, his philosophies around mindset, habits and routine. What are big, hairy, audacious goals. Why challenges are so critically important to growth, his nightly and morning routines, and last but not least, adversity. 

[00:01:25] Todd is one of the most inspiring, thoughtful and intentional people I know on social media. I know you will find this to be an invaluable conversation. 

[00:01:36] Todd Durkin, such a pleasure to connect with you. And for listeners that may not know, I have known Todd since middle school. 

Todd Durkin: [00:01:45] That's crazy. 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:01:47] It is a crazy thing. I was like trying to explain that to my kids last night and I was mentioning to my team, I kept saying the name Todd and I said, no not Todd, my husband, Todd Durkin, my guest tomorrow, I have known for a long, long time, but it's so nice to be reconnected to you. And I interviewed your niece on the podcast and knowingly that's kind of what got us reconnected. And then I was a guest on your podcast earlier this year and it's nice to be able to bring your wisdom to Everyday Wellness.

Todd Durkin: [00:02:15] Well, Cynthia, thank you. Thank you for everything that you're doing and I know you're making a huge impact with your community and I look forward to sharing anything I can to help you and your folks out. 

Cynthia [00:02:25] Yeah, it's interesting the thing that one of many things about you that stands out is not only your commitment to your faith, but also to your family. And I know that you come from a very large family, you're the youngest of eight, we grew up in the same town. And how do you think your trajectory, your success was probably in many instances was invested upon and grew from the lessons that you learned from your siblings, your mom, your dad. And I know that you have a very strong sense of family now. You've been married for 20 plus years. You have three beautiful children. How do you think that has impacted the success that you have today? 

Todd Durkin: [00:03:12] I think it's a huge aspect because as you know, us both growing up in New Jersey, in Brick, I think it's a big part of it because it was a very blue-collar town for myself growing up the youngest of eight kids. We didn't have a lot of money growing up, so I was the lunch ticket kid, Cynthia. I don't know if you knew that, but I would be like embarrassed going through the lunch line with the lunch tickets. And I think-- I always say this is, never forget who you are and where you come from, because I think a big part of who I am as a man is because of where I come from. And I'm very, very proud to come from Brick and grow up with the people I grew up with and to have the coaches in my life that I had the opportunity to play for in both football, basketball, baseball growing up. And they were huge mentors in my life overall. 

[00:04:01] And I think that as a man today, now living in San Diego, California, I have been married for 24 years and I'm blessed to have a great family. But I think those values get instilled at a young age regardless of, where one comes from, you get those from your parents and where you grew up. I'm very, very fortunate and I feel blessed to come from Brick and now having a life where I can impact people nationwide. 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:04:29] Yeah. And it's interesting because I know on your podcast, we talked about this, that one of the things that my stepfather, my first stepfather really embraced was the hustle. He could never be more proud than if I had two jobs and I was putting money in the bank and saving for college or saving money to pay for my car insurance. I just recall that value set was something that left an indelible impression, the importance of family and being connected, but also just having a strong sense of who you are. And it wasn't until, I went off to college that I realized other people lived really differently. And in some instances, they could have been very affluent, but maybe they were very disconnected from their families. They didn't feel a strong sense of family. But also- 

Todd Durkin: [00:05:16] Right.

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:05:17] -those gifts of just understanding what's ultimately most important and achievement. I know for you were incredibly successful. You were-- I just-- It's funny, as I was reading your book, it just reaffirms some of the things that I recall. We went to two different high schools, but you were like, the football guy, and then you went on to play in college. And just achieving like scholastically for both of us was something that my parents really-- They were very, very proud of, because to them, that was hard work plus discipline equals success. And how do you think over the course of the past 30, 40 years, you went on to play in the football league in Europe and then transitioned to grad school, met your wife. How do you think this trajectory? What are the things about playing sports that translated into good characteristics that have allowed you to build a phenomenal business and to be in a position where you're continuing to influence people of various age groups?

Todd Durkin: [00:06:17] Yeah, I'll share this. And it does go back a bit, is because when I was a young boy in Brick, my parents got divorced when I was five years old. So, between five and ten, when my father came back into my life, I always felt like I had something to prove. I was the youngest of eight kids, so you’ve got to prove yourself when you're the youngest. And then not having a father, I felt almost as if I had to achieve a certain level of success to get people's love, like, that was just me as a kid. 

[00:06:50] So, as you mentioned, growing up, to me, sports was the way out. And that to me, when I started getting success in sport, I realized, “Hey, okay, I'm pretty good in this.” I knew that was my way, if I want to get a college scholarship, that football could be that thing. And from 5 to 18, I found success in sport. I believe it's because the parents going through a tough time, not having money, I knew that-- I felt like inside like I had something in me that was special, not really knowing what that was as a kid. But looking back now, I realize it's a big part of who I am and the success that I've had. 

[00:07:27] What I always say now with complete humility is whatever one has success wise is, you take it with a grain of salt. To me, even right now, I feel like there's so much that I have not yet done that I'm only getting started in a lot of ways. And, in reflection, yes, I've done some decent things in that, but I feel like the best really is yet to come, and there's so much ahead of me that I guess that's kind of the mindset that I have is I'm very, very grateful for where I come from and what was instilled in me from the coach Wolf of the world who I just dedicated my last book to. These are coaches and mentors that even now in my early 50s, I feel like are people that I'm going to always lean in on. So, it's an interesting thing when you look back. Again, I have five sisters, so five sisters, two brothers. I always had something to prove as the youngest of the eight. 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:08:25] Yeah, I mean, I find it so interesting because I think I realized that because I grew up in Monmouth County, so I grew up in Wall, and then my mom got remarried and we relocated to Ocean County. And I recall one of the big things that I recognized pretty early on if I was going to-- And I knew this from the beginning, I was always going to leave New Jersey. I was born in South Carolina. I just knew that I was going to live outside the state. And achievement was how I did that, like, that was achieve, achieve, achieve, and that was going to be my ticket out. Although, again, I love my friends from New Jersey. I just knew fervently that for me, I was meant to be probably in the south. And that's where I am, and that's where I've been this whole time. 

[00:09:04] So, for many different directions, I think the lessons that we learn as children, as young adults, you know, we can head in multiple different directions, but I think the defining-- one of the defining characteristics that I see in both of us is that we're never just settling. We're always ensuring that we're continuing to be challenged, that we're pushing ourselves. And certainly, you've had some big pivots over the last couple years, not just spiritually, physically, financially, in every direction, and it's God's guidance guiding you in a direction that he foresees that he wants you to be within. 

[00:09:40] One of the things that I took away from reading your books is you choose change or change chooses you. How do you think that has helped define the last 53 years of your life in terms of when you look retrospectively, I think it's easy for us to look back, but sometimes in the moment, we don't realize that the changes that we're making can have a profound net impact on the trajectory of our lives. 

Todd Durkin: [00:10:07] Mm-hmm. Yeah, it's a great question. I think so many times we try to control the future or we have these dreams. And listen, I'm the biggest dreamer there is. I'm always looking at the vision of the future and heck, I'm working on another vision board right now with my team at IMPACT-X Performance. We work on vision boards and not just like the pictures, but what we're going to create in the next one, three, and 10 years. And I realize that we have visions, we all have dreams in that, but I also realize is how do you have these dreams but also stay in the here and the now? And I'm trying to really work on that myself, is enjoying the process even more. 

[00:10:41] I love to roll up my sleeves and get dirty and really go through that, but how can I enjoy the toil of every day. When you say you choose change or change chooses you? There are some things we just can't control. And relinquishing control of the things we can't control is hard. And that's my daily prayer is, you know, “God, please present me before me today anything that you want me to do and allow me to step into that with grace.” And there's a lot of things we can't control, but I look back and I'm like, “Okay, everything's happened for a reason.” And as I look forward and even into the future on that is, I'm really excited about all the things that are happening, but at the same time, I want to make sure I can enjoy the steps where I'm at right now. So, it's something that we rhetorically say, “Hey, you choose change or change chooses you.” It is the truth. There are changes inside each and every one of us that we know we need to make. If you quiet everything down, you go out for a walk with the pup and you're like, man in your self-talk, you're saying these things of maybe one, two or three things personally or even professionally that you want to change, but why is it so many times it takes us a year or three to make the changes? Or in my case, change was chosen for me. I didn't choose some of the changes that actually happened, they were chosen for me and I had to step into them and say, “Okay, where are they leading me? I'm not sure, but I've got to step into it.” 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:12:06] Well, and I think in so many different ways, when I reflect back on my previous 53 years, the things that have been my greatest teachers have been when it's been hard. I tell people transparently, 2019 into 2020, no one would have questioned me not making certain decisions. No one would have questioned-- We picked up in 2020 and left Northern Virginia. We had lived there for 20 years. We picked up and moved, and one of the best decisions we ever made. And so, I think sometimes, God, the universe is kind of pushing you gently in a particular direction. And I think it's hard. People have a hard time. They can get into analysis, paralysis. They feel like there's too many choices. They can't make a decision. And I say, sometimes the best decision you can make is not making a decision, not forcing a decision, not forcing an outcome. I think it's human nature that when we're uncomfortable, we don't want to sit in silence. We don't per se want to not make a decision. And sometimes the best thing we can do is to kind of just sit and be mindful and wait. And that's again, it's the human nature piece, so many people struggle with that, they want to force an outcome, which I still look back retrospectively. 

[00:13:21] I think in my 20s, when I was doing a second degree and I was in a new city and had a whole bunch of new friends and trying to navigate decisions. And in many, many instances, change can be challenging and change can be paralyzing. When you're speaking to-- And I know that you do a lot of motivational speaking. And Todd is restrained right now. Todd has a massive extroverted personality and he brings so much enthusiasm, but right now, he's kind of restrained and quiet. But when you walk into a room and you're motivating a group of people, how do you dig deep to be able to get people to see things from your perspective or from a different perspective, to get out of their own way to motivate them? 

Todd Durkin: [00:14:04] I believe that's one of my divine gifts. When I'm in a room, whether it's 100 people, 500 people, a thousand or more, I get lit up by groups. I really get lit up. And I enjoy the process of that and sharing a lot of the stories because I always remind myself, it's not about me. When I'm speaking, it's not about me. It's how can my story inspire others to live their best life? I always say, “Live a life worth telling a story, but what's your story? How can you get into one's body, mind, soul to the point where you inspire them that, ‘hey, I'm either worth more or I deserve to step into this next iteration of myself. How do I get my mojo back? How do I restore my energy, my passion, my purpose?’” 

[00:14:49] These are the things I step into when I'm on stage. And people always are like, “Are you always this fired up?” And my wife would be, “No, he's not always this fired up.” But I am always excited about the opportunity to speak and meet. I was like, if I can reach one person on this podcast here, Cynthia, or on stage, regardless of the sector or industry, then my job is done because that's when I feel like I'm serving my best is when I'm able to share and get into someone's mind and say, “I can do this. I'm meant for this,” inspires them to take action for what needs to happen. 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:15:24] Now, before you get on stage, do you have any rituals? And the reason why I'm asking is I have rituals that I do to kind of-- as an introvert, I have to be like mentally ready to get up and speak to people. What are the things that you do to get mentally dialed in to be able to step on stage and serve your community? 

Todd Durkin: [00:15:43] I have a bunch, actually. [laughter] I created a course last year on this because it's so important, it's like your habits. And for me, every time, it doesn't matter what time I'm starting, it starts with my morning workout, my morning routine. And like I get my workout and I rehearse everything I'm going to say. I visualize everything I'm going to say. And my review, my points and how I'm going to connect with the audience and. And I literally sit down and meditate and visualize going through that for 45 minutes to an hour after my workout. And if it's, I'm on stage at 07:30 in the morning, then I'm up at 04:00 or 04:30 going through that because that's going to get the energy flowing and going when you can do that. 

[00:16:20] And then when I'm going through it, the other thing that I do is like right before I'm going out, I have a whole breath work routine that I do because the breath work, what I realized early on, 15 years ago or so, I got so excited, I get too excited, I start hyperventilating before I go out. So, I had to learn how to use my breath to actually slow everything down because you have to manipulate the energy on the stage that you're not always just on fire, but you're bringing people through the ups and the downs of the story. And I know in the stories I share there's highs and there's lows of every story, like everyone has highs and lows, so the breath can really help deliver the experience that you're hoping for so that you can master the delivery, so it really hits people as hard as it needs to hit. 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:17:09] Do you listen to any particular music or inspirational quotes or is there anything that you do? So, I'm kind of leaning into this because I'm going to share after you share what I do, which is what gets me pumped up, if you will, to get on stage as an introvert. I just keep emphasizing that I think a lot of people don't realize I'm a huge introvert. 

Todd Durkin: [00:17:29] Yeah. Specifically, I have a playlist that I listen. 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:17:32] I know. I figured you did. [laughs] 

Todd Durkin: [00:17:36] And my playlist is. It's called GYMR9. Get your mind right 9. I have all these different playlists for different things. [Cynthia laughs] And it's all music that to me, gets me excited and fired up. And it's a range of music. It's all different genres, but I put it together and that's my like I don't want to say hype music. It's like I feel like a million dollars when I listen to it. I'm also then-- usually I'm on the elliptical kind of visualizing my notes and I'm going through it for like 30, 40 minutes and then I hit the weights. And that playlist, for me is my key that it's game time and start locking in, and I do that, I go eat and then I'm showered and ready to go. 

[00:18:19] But for me, it's like when I speak, it's game day. And my game day is I got to perform and I got to do my best to make sure that the message comes across. Again, not for people to say, “Oh, what an awesome story he's got.” No, that's not the point. It's how can my story inspire someone else to live their best story? And that's always the thing I tell any speaker is “It's not about you. It's about using your story or experience or wisdom to inspire others to live their best life.” And that's what I try to do. And I've learned that lesson now many times over about, “Man, you're trying to reach hundreds or thousands of people. Use your story to inspire those to step into the best version of themselves.” 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:18:58] Now, you can understand why Todd is so successful, especially in this motivational speaking, because he really does the work. He puts in all the work and effort to make sure that he shows up in the best way possible. So, the two things that I've learned, I get nervous before I speak on stage. So, I do breath work so that I can slow my heart rate down, so that I can get out of the sympathetic and in the parasympathetic and get into a flow state. Because when I step on stage that way, then it just flows. 

[00:19:27] But the one thing that I do, and it was probably maybe four or five years ago, and they said, “What song do you want to enter the stage at?” And I said, “I don't know.” Well, anyone that is familiar with Virginia Tech, they know that Enter Sandman is their [Todd laughs] battle cry. And so this is before. My oldest is now a student at Virginia Tech. When I hear Enter Sandman, I get goosebumps.

Todd Durkin: [00:19:52] Yeah. 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:19:53] It pumps me up in a way that is probably a little bit odd, but it gets me very emotional. So, for me, that's usually what I have playing before I get on stage, because it just gets me in the right mindset, like, go out there and do what you do best. And the irony is, now that I have a child at Virginia Tech, I get to hear that song all the time. [laughs] Life imitating art. But for me, that's part of my process. But the same thing with you. I get up, I exercise, that's part of it. 

[00:20:19] I like quiet time before I get on stage. I'm not someone that shows up an hour before my talk. I'm usually the person that shows up 15 to 20 minutes before my talk because I actually do better being introspective prior to delivering a talk or something that's motivational, because, again, I'm protecting my energy. So, I know myself well enough, I am extroverted enough that I can get on stage and deliver this speech. But I'm also cognizant of the fact I'm never going to be Tony Robbins. I'm never going to be someone that gets up in front of 10,000 people and feeds off the audience. I get up and I do what I need to do. I do it well, just like you do. But I love hearing how other people prepare themselves mentally for these kinds of events. Have you ever had a time where there was a glitch, your slides didn't work? There was some type of technical thing. This just happened to me, that's why I'm asking.

Todd Durkin: [00:21:12] I've had so many. [laughs] 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:21:13] Yeah. 

Todd Durkin: [00:21:16] I mean, getting stuck in an elevator and not-- I literally had the fire department have to come get me and almost missed the [unitelligible]-

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:21:20] No.

Todd Durkin: [00:21:21] -to, all of that. Absolutely. Or you come out and your walkout song isn't playing and you're just-- Everything is very systematic as you know. So, the slides. Now obviously, you learn a lot of lessons there where the tech doesn't work and the slides or the videos aren't working, if you've got any slides. So, you just got to know your stuff so well that, “Hey, I don't need the slides. I don't need the videos. I can go out there and just be me if I have to.” But, oh, yeah, I've had all that. And speaking of Tony Robbins, I actually learned something from him years ago that I still use right before I go on stage. It's an energy. And anyone could use this at any time, where it's almost like Wim Hof breathwork that I do it [makes sounds]

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:22:05] Yep. 

Todd Durkin: [00:22:07] And I'm actually trying to take the energy that was manifested within and start to like get it out of me. And this is like right before so that I realize its energy is going out. And if we look at ourselves as energy fields of how do we take this energy? So, people can almost feel the radiant energy coming out. And I learned that years ago, and I still use it right before I go out, is all right, it's time to take, like, if you go to your heart, you go to your inner self, and you've manifested this great energy in the morning and from how you live, how do you then take that and radiate it out so people can feel that? And to me, that's the one thing I think that will make some of our talks unique is people feel it. It's not just words. I always say, “People got to feel you. In the back of the room, they got to feel you.” Well, how do you make people feel something? It's not how you say it. It's the energy you come across. And it's authentic and it's organic in that. So, I think it all comes into play. And, Cynthia, the same way you come across on stage as well. 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:23:12] Yeah. It's interesting. The reason why I asked if you've ever had a tech glitch. So, this happened to me for the first time In November, I was at an event called Eudaimonia, where Huberman Lab, Gabrielle Lyon, Mark Hyman, all these big people in the health and wellness space were there, and humble old me, and I get up on stage and they're apologizing like, “Cynthia, we can't get your slides to work.” It wasn't issue with my slides. It was like they were having a computer malfunction. And, after 15 minutes, I've got a full room, and I just said, “I'm going to just go.” And here's the differentiator. I know my material so well, I was able to talk from memory. 

[00:23:47] And I said, “The only thing I ask is that you share my slides with this group of people, because they came here to see me speak. And actually, I have good slides.” Like I actually have slides that would be helpful for them to have, but I remember after the fact, one of the organizers came up to me and said, “Thank you for being so gracious.” And I said, “Well, of course. Why would I not be?” And they said, “A lot of people would have been rattled. They would have been really rattled. They would have been upset. They would have been flustered. They would not have been able to deliver.” And I said, “I'm a professional. I take this seriously.” And it was like, I was prepared. I knew what was on my slides. And therefore, for that reason, I can get up and I can speak to people. And I would say, “Well, hey, I'd love to show you this article, but I can't actually do it. So just know that you'll be getting all of these in your email in a PDF later today.” But I think it goes back to anything in life, when things don't work the way that we want them to, where the way we expect them to, how do we show up in life when things don't go the way we want them to or the way that we anticipate they will go? And to me, it's just, you got to roll with the punches. 

Todd Durkin: [00:24:50] Yeah. You almost wonder sometimes if your talk was better by being extraneous, meaning it's not so rehearsed that it was, you had to be so in the moment, what's the next line? What's next? 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:25:03] Yeah. 

Todd Durkin: [00:25:04] Like you were so in the moment that you sometimes wonder, “Was it better that way? And what was the feedback?” So, when things go wrong sometimes, like, “Okay, I'm going to roll and flow with it and see what happens,” and, “Oh, my gosh, that was the best talk ever.” You're like, “Was it? Maybe I should use a slide and I should just go in and do my thing,” so, it's always interesting when something like that happens. 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:25:25] Yeah. And I think it always falls back on your training like-

Todd Durkin: [00:25:28] That’s right. 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:25:30] -you're an athlete, and I'm a clinician, in the midst of chaos in a hospital. And if anyone's watching The Pitt right now, which I'm completely obsessed with, because it is the only medical-drama I've ever watched that is even remotely accurate. As a former ER nurse in inner city, Baltimore, if I was calm, everyone was calm. So, it's like when all the tech people were freaking out, I was like, “It's okay. I'm a professional. I'm still going to give my talk. I'm not going to get upset about it. There's nothing to get upset about.” 

[00:26:00] And I think it goes back to-- We all fall back to our training. Ultimately, like, even we had a snafu with our puppy two weeks ago because of something that my teenage son did, which was one of those stupid lessons that teenagers will learn. And he kept saying, “You're so calm.” And I said, “If I'm not calm, how is that going to help the situation? We're dealing with an emergency. And if I'm not calm, you're not going to be calm. The dog's going to be in a worse state. The vet's not going to be able to do their job.” And so, I think that some of the lessons we learn throughout our lifetime are designed to how do we show up when there's an emergency, an urgency or something just doesn't go our way because that is part of life, life is not predictable, I wish it was, but it's not. 

Todd Durkin: [00:26:45] Yeah, you're right. Absolutely. They say that what you raise up to your level of expectations or fall down your level of training, and that's exactly right. 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:26:53] Yeah. And I think in so many instances, when I reflect on. Yeah, the transition I made nine years ago, leaving traditional kind of allopathic medicine and starting my own business and having my own practice, the concept of big, hairy, audacious goals, so I know you love acronyms, Todd. 

Todd Durkin: [00:27:09] I do. 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:27:12] I think all of us need to have these, irrespective of where we are in time and space. And how do you think setting whether it's your vision board, whether it's sitting down with your team, whether it's making family goals, how do you feel like defining big, hairy, audacious goals has been kind of a defining feature of your life? 

Todd Durkin: [00:27:33] Well, goals give us life. Goals give us the life, they give us the energy. But many times when we become adults, we stop dreaming, we stop having dreams. So, if you don't have a dream, then what are you working for other than you're just showing up and going through the paces every day. So, to me, whether it be a big, hairy, audacious goal or what's your dream? I have this thing I do every year and it's called my God-sized dreams planner. And it's literally the questions that one would go through to ask yourself, what are your big dreams? What are your dreams for this year? What are your dreams with your family? What kind of dream trips do you want to take? And it puts you in a vibration or a space where you actually operate at a higher level because you're dreaming. And dreams give us life. 

[00:28:17] So, when I say that, some people I work with in the life coaching department, they haven't dreamt in years, they don't have any big dreams or their dreams are about other people. And I think we all need our own personal dreams whatever that looks like, whether they be financially, relationally, professionally, physically, spiritually, like what are those dreams that you want to achieve? And when you write them down, then they really take life. And when you think them and you write them down and then you share them, like they take more of life to say, “Okay, this is what I'm about and this is what I'm being ordained to do.” And then the next thing you know, they start manifesting, they start happening. 

[00:28:58] And to me, I've lived the last 15 years of my life and career by that exact step. And does it always happen? No, it doesn't. But it's certainly going to get you in a direction and a vibration and put you in a mindset on a daily that's going to allow you to live, I'll say more fully and more fruitfully with your spouse, with your kids, with your family, with your profession, whatever that may be. So, dreams are essential and we've got to have dreams and that's why we read, that’s why we read books. And it is really good for our minds and it's sometimes good for our souls. So, I'm a huge dreamer and I've lived my life that way, but I don't like just to dream and dream. I like to dream and then take action to move closer to what those dreams may well become.

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:29:44] Yeah, I think it's important because I have teenagers. I have two boys, one's 19, one 17, and my older son is a little more open minded than my 17-year-old. And so, my 17-year-old said, “Oh, you just going to manifest?” He's like, “Manifest.” And I said, “If you actually look at the science, there's real science behind this. And so, I think it's important to have dreams and wishes.” And I've been putting into-- When I designed the supplement line, I said, “I'm going to sell this in three to five years.” 

Todd Durkin: [00:30:13] Yep. 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:30:14] It's already happened. It's already in the process. I'm doing all the right things. But from my perspective, when I start saying those dreams out loud, it's because I really believe that I'm calling them into the possibility of actually occurring. And I think we play it safe when we don't talk about what we're dreaming about. I encourage my kids, the big audacious goals, I'm like, you should have big audacious goals. And it's okay if you end up deciding you don't want to go to graduate school, or you don't want that kind of job, or you decide to change your major or that relationship you thought was going somewhere is not going somewhere. I think it's helpful for all of us to challenge ourselves and to not get stagnant. It is so easy to be complacent. It's easier to be complacent.

Todd Durkin: [00:30:59] Absolutely. I remember people saying that you remember the whole thinking grow rich- 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:31:04] Yes. 

Todd Durkin: [00:31:04] -or [crosstalk] not think grow rich. It was the secret. 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:31:05] Yes. 

Todd Durkin: [00:31:06] And the secret was all about like, think you're going to become a millionaire and you will become a millionaire. And it's like-- I've had so many arguments or discussions about this is like, “No, just because you think you're going to do it, you dream it, doesn't mean it's going to happen. But when you dream it and you do think it, you think it into existence because when you think it, if you write it and share it, then you're more likely to take action on it. Just because you think it doesn't mean something's going to happen.” Because the last I checked, everyone wants to be healthy, everyone wants more money, everyone wants like the best life. But when you actually can think it and you take action on what steps are necessary to help you get you to where you want to go, then you're more likely to “manifest” what is there, but you got to first think it and dream it to become it. 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:31:52] Yeah, I just think it's so easy to-- I think about my father who passed last year, and he said to me years ago when I was going off to graduate school, “You finally are actualizing your potential.” And that hit me hard because in many ways I was living up to what he thought my potential was. 

Todd Durkin: [00:32:13] Yeah. 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:32:15] And I remember saying to him, “I think that you're not setting your sights high enough.” Because to me it was like, “Well, this is, of course I'm going-- This is where I'm going to get a second degree, and this is where I'm going to grad school. Of course this is what I'm doing, but that I'm not setting the level right here. It's like the levels up here.” And that's always been what's the next thing I can do to get myself closer to a place where I continue to be challenged intellectually.

[00:32:41] It's interesting, this morning I interviewed Dr. Heather Sandison, and so she's out, ironically, in California, and she is a physician that deals solely with patients with Alzheimer's. So, she talks about all the things that we can be doing lifestyle wise, that can lessen the likelihood we'll ever deal with cognitive decline. Because I don't know if you're at this stage of life, Todd, but a lot of conversations with girlfriends were now, like, “Okay, make sure you let me know if you ever notice I'm like not remembering things or I'm acting goofy or struggling with words or struggling to find a phrase or something that should be familiarized with.” And so, when I think about the concept of challenging yourself and how some people embrace that and other people kind of turn their backs and are like, “I don't need to continue growing,” but continuing to learn is so important for brain health and reasoning and executive function. 

[00:33:36] And so I know for you, this is something that you also embrace, that you are very conscientious about reading, listening to podcasts, probably getting your own-- I always say the best coaches are being coached by someone else to kind of level up your mindset. So, I'm curious right now, are there specific books or podcasts that you find particularly helpful in this area? Because I think this is something that's always-- It's almost like a stone that's constantly being sharpened or a stone that's constantly being shined, something you're continuing to refine throughout your lifetime, it's a never-ending process is essentially what I'm saying. 

Todd Durkin: [00:34:15] Right. Absolutely. It's interesting because when you think about you can only go as far as you grow. The times I've been most stale in my life where I feel like I'm just not growing, typically, I'm not reading or I'm not investing in coaching myself. And I'm someone who coaches a lot of other people, but I need to be coached myself to keep going beyond the upper limit. And as I share this right now, while I'm based in San Diego, I'm actually recording this with you, I'm in Alabama at an event and I have my books literally right here. I'm rereading The Big Leap. I don’t think--

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:34:48] It's a great book. 

Todd Durkin: [00:34:50] Great book, The Big Leap. And I've got another book here on Free PR that was recommended by my coach and it's all about how-- from Cameron Herald. So, I'm reading right now. I'm here presenting and speaking, but I'm reading and learning and growing because I just find that the mind, especially nowadays, it's easier to scroll on Instagram. 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:35:11] Mm-hmm. 

Todd Durkin: [00:35:12] And I don't feel like you can get the depth that you need when you can really invest a week or two reading someone's book and go deep. Cynthia, and I know, you had just sent out a book to my wife and she loved it. She was voraciously going through the whole book and she was loving it. It's like, “How can we grow deeper?” And I think that's investing in yourself on whether it's a book, whether it's a podcast, I try to listen to most every day during the week a podcast when I'm out for a walk and working out. And then having a coach, I mean, whether it be a life coach, a business coach, a spiritual coach, I've been a coach for 20 plus years, but a majority of that time I've always had a coach in different areas of my life as well. So, I'm a huge advocate of ongoing growth personally and professionally to help keep your mind sharp so you can go back and do great things as well. 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:36:06] Yeah. You know, it's interesting I was reflecting on this because we moved into a new house in 2021 and we did a big downsize, which was a good decision. Sometimes my teenagers complain about it, but here in Richmond, not everyone has a basement, so we have a third floor instead of a basement. Well, it's taken a while to kind of continue to purge, organize, we're almost there, but I have so many books, Todd, thousands and thousands of books. And so, one of my goals has been to get myself better organized with the books because some books I'm probably, I could donate, and someone would still benefit from the books. 

[00:36:42] I look at books as a life force. I'm always reading. In fact, this is how much of a nerd I am. I am going to be interviewing a biological dentist on the podcast and this book called Jaws. It's a hidden epidemic, but it's talking about how modern dentistry has contributed to a lot of breathing problems and spatial problems with your tongue and all sorts of stuff. But I think for all of us, it's continuing to be challenged. So, I jokingly have said, I mean, I've been in some type of a variation of a training program my entire adult life, so, I'm still doing-- I'm getting ready to finish up a functional training. I'm always doing like-- I'll say, “Oh, I need to do this. There's always something I'm learning from.” I agree with you about having coaches throughout our trajectory of our lifetime. I just spent about two years with someone doing a lot of spiritual work that was fantastic. Only added to being in the right mindset and thinking about things differently. I think finding the reframe in so many instances, it is very easy on social media, even for those of us that have businesses. Sometimes, I just put my blinders on now. I don't allow anyone to distract me from my purpose and who I serve of. I'm like, there's plenty of room for plenty of people. I just don't believe in a scarcity mindset, but I think having a coach makes me better at everything I do because I'm accountable to someone. And I think that you can only watch so much Netflix, you can only watch so much Hulu. I need to stimulate my brain, whether it's with a podcast, or Audible has been like my best friend, Todd. Honestly, I probably listen to more books. 

Todd Durkin: [00:38:18] Yes. 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:38:19] Than I do podcasts right now because I get interested in something, admittedly, I get very nerdy. I'll get very interested in a subject. And my husband's like, “Have at it. You spend 25 hours listening to Audible book on the Challenger Disaster.” And I don't share that to be morbid. It's interesting all the logistics of what kind of played a role in that. But I think for each one of us, finding ways to stimulate our brain or stimulate our spiritual side and continue to offer value to our communities is really important. 

Todd Durkin: [00:38:53] Yeah. 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:38:55] And I know you're chuckling. You saw that cover. 

Todd Durkin: [00:38:56] Well, I'm laughing. I'm laughing at your thousand books. 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:39:00] It's insane. 

Todd Durkin: [00:39:01] It's the one thing that Melanie and I, my wife and I, she's like, “Can we get rid of half your book?” 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:39:06] Yep, my husband. 

Todd Durkin: [crosstalk] -like 20 years ago. You don't need them. And I got my mom, my late mom, who just passed. She had like “She will not throw anything out.” And I'm like, “No, don't throw that book out. I might read it again.” She's like, “You're not going to read this book again. It was written in 2003.” I'm like, “Don't throw it out.” So, I've got like a room that's a library that we will not throw anything out and I’m like, “Don't touch any of these books. They're like prized possessions.” I'm laughing about your thousand books because I'm in the same boat. [laughs] 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:39:33] Yeah, well, I mean, it's a good problem to have. And what's ironic is when my dad passed and my brother and I had to clean out their condo. My dad was a voracious reader. He still had his paper doctoral dissertation from the 1960s. And so, my brother and I were-- He still had his-- And we're dating ourselves by saying this, but his index cards because back then you didn't have a computer. He had index cards with rubber bands, and the rubber bands were falling apart. And then he had books, books that I was like, “I'm not sure a library even wants these books.” But he had so many books. And I think that's a good problem to have. If you have to have something like that around that, to me, speaks to someone that has an intellectual curiosity about the world and just wants to learn more. Now, my husband's an engineer in his mindset, it takes up too much room. 

Todd Durkin: [00:40:23] Right. 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:40:24] So, he would like me to get rid of said book. So, I do have some books that I probably will never read that are now-- We're going to donate them to a homeless shelter, but they'll go to good use. They will still get used. But yes, I chuckle because I still have some of my medical books. I have my biochemistry text. I have my organic chemistry text, my physics, why, I do not know. Maybe it's time to get rid of those. 

Todd Durkin: [00:40:49] I was like “Hun, don't touch my home office or the home gym, anything else in this house, you can do whatever else you want in this entire house, but the home gym and the home office, don't touch it.” 

[laughter]

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:41:04] I love that. So, let's talk about your morning routine because you talk about this in your books. It is very structured. Again, I think that this is what sets you up for success for the day. And there are probably many people listening that are curious what we do in the morning to set ourselves up, because it's not willy nilly. I mean, there is purpose behind it. And I think the purpose is what contributes to the tremendous success that you see because you are so conscientious about your time and where your attention goes. 

Todd Durkin: [00:41:37] Well, it's unfortunately learned a lot from also making the mistakes of how do I structure my time and energy so I can produce and be how I want to be. My morning routine actually starts the night before. My night time routine, I learned that during the pandemic. I use a 3-2-1 technique at night, three hours before I go to sleep, I eat, two hours, I shut down work, and the last hour is personal care. Because that last hour, especially during a pandemic, I was always on my phone and I wasn't doing what I need to do, now stretch, read some books, get some quiet time with the Missus. Like all of the things that are important I wasn't doing. 

[00:42:18] So, 3-2-1 at night, try to get some good sleep, which that's another story, but during the pandemic I was diagnosed from our good friend Gabrielle Lyon with sleep apnea. And now I'm like really, really fanatical about the quality of sleep that I get. Then, I go into my morning routine because if I get a good night's sleep, then I'm rested enough to do my morning routine. And this is the routine that works for me. So please don't feel like you need to replicate anyone. This is my routine and it's taken years to kind of get into my routine, but I call it my holy hour. And my holy hour is actually two hours, but I call it my holy hour because it's my time, and between like 5 and 7’ish is the time I get for myself. And it's my-- I call it selfish, but it's more being selfless so I can serve the rest of the day. 

[00:43:07] I mean, for me, it's-- I take about 15 to 20 minutes of quiet time in the morning. I journal, I get in the word and I do my prayer time and then I go in my home gym, I get the dog out for a walk, which is typically 20, 30 minutes. And I get my home gym, I work out. And I love my home gym workouts because no one's bothering me. [Cynthia Laughs] I'm listening to a podcast. I try to work out my own gym and people are coming up to me, “Hey, quick question.” And the quick question isn't a quick question, it's a 20-minute discussion. And I lose my mojo during the workout. So, I get that time in and then I get my stretch time and I like to journal a little bit again on my upcoming day and get my big five.

[00:43:44] I send out three texts. This is always people like intrigued by this, but I send out three texts a day to someone who's been on my mind or is on my mind at that moment of just like some inspiration to someone like, “Hey, you're on my mind. I'm thinking of you. Thank you for everything that you do. I love working with you,” or whoever it may be. And if I do three a day, that's 15 a week that I'm getting in, Monday through Friday. To me that's the routine that allows me then to go in, get my breakfast, eat good because the morning breakfast, if one's eating, not fasting is-- Like that's a two-hour window of time for me, that's all me. And then I'm ready to go do my thing. And whether that means I'm going to the gym to train people, I'm doing my life coaching, I'm working on the franchise, whatever that is, now I'm ready to go that by 8 o’clock. Again, I know we talked on the, on my show that you like to sleep in. I'm a morning guy, so I like to go to bed early, I get up early and then I'm ready to conquer the day by 8 o’clock.

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:44:45] Yeah. And I think for each one of us, it's figuring out what works. For years I was up at 4:30 or 5 o’clock and going to the gym and then going to the hospital. And I think the pandemic for all us just reaffirmed until we got the puppy. I like to sleep till 7. Now I don't get to do that. The puppy is like up at 06:30 AM. If he lets me sleep till 06:40 AM, we're having a pretty good day. And so, it just reminds me that we have to constantly be evolving, but that special kind of time. Like I within my business, I'm not in front of people within my business before 11, and I can manage that most days. Obviously, when the book launch comes, I won't. 

[00:45:24] I'll beholden to other people's schedules, but that's because I take that morning time to do the things that allow me to show up in my business. And actually, I found with book writing this time around, I did really well writing from 12 to 8. Like, that was my time. When I had gotten up, I had exercised, I'd eaten, I'd showered to make myself presentable, and then I could write. But if I started earlier in the day, I was grumpy and cranky because I didn't get my exercise in. And much like you talk about this, exercise to me is part stress relief, but it's also so important to invest in avoiding sarcopenia. And let's be clear, we know women are really at a disadvantage as they're navigating perimenopause into menopause. 

[00:46:06] And so for so many of us, it's like doing-- It's just part of your daily routine. You have to look at exercises that even if it's one day, you're doing Zone 2 training with a weighted vest. There's not a flat surface in my entire neighborhood. It is the rolling hills of central Virginia. I don't even need the weight is best to get my heart rate up because there are so many hills walking the dogs. And so, I think for each one of us, it's figuring out what works best. And I love that you start at night. You're setting yourself up for success in the morning by having that 3-2-1. 

Todd Durkin: [00:46:39] Yep. Yep.

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:46:41] Now, Todd, one thing in your book that really stood out and it made me think about it when you mentioned every day you send three texts to people you're thinking about. You mentioned in the book that you have a good friend who has had a terrible diagnosis. And you mentioned in the book that you reached out to him and your approach to inspiring him or supporting him. And he said, “You're probably not accustomed to this kind of vernacular, given the severity of your injuries, but I just want you to know I'm here for you.” And so, the concept of intentionality is something that is woven throughout your work, throughout all of your books, being intentional with the people that you care about. 

[00:47:19] For you personally, having gone through a really tough few years physically, you played sports your entire lifetime. And, for those that read True Strength, there is a photo of the x-ray of Todd's back, which, when I looked at it, I thought to myself, it's unbelievable that you are still standing, moving around, but you never allowed yourself to feel like a victim. You experienced the whole constellation of emotions as you were navigating treatment decisions. You had one knee done, another knee done. Then you had the serious back issue, which ultimately you were able to successfully kind of navigate without what sounded like a horrific surgical intervention that was presented to you until you found the right provider. What was that process like for you having-- In light of the fact that you were this incredibly positive, thoughtful, intentional person, what has that taught you about yourself?

Todd Durkin: [00:48:16] Mm-hmm. You want to go there, huh, Cynthia? 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:48:20] I do. I do. Your book is called True Strength. We might as well like touch on this very important topic.

Todd Durkin: [00:48:25] Yeah, it's interesting. Looking back, it's interesting because, man, everyone's got their own story during the pandemic and the battles they faced. And maybe some people are facing them today. I just happen to face mine over a three-and-a-half-year period that I say is like, hell. It makes sense now, but going through it was very, very difficult. I always say this, “Be the most positive person you know,” and I pride myself on me being that way with like “I'm going to be the most positive person that I know. I'm going to battle like heck to do that.” This period of time for me was the most difficult time and that includes I lost my father at the age of 20. And going through this long battle. I went into that pandemic burnt out of everything I was doing. I was shot. 

[00:49:11] I had a lot of success inside the fitness field, but there was something inside of me that said, “Man, there's like more. There's something deeper that you're not scratching yet.” And this was more the whispers that was-- I know there's another level. So, when this all hit, I had my second knee replacement in 2020. And I'll fast forward, I'll tell this short story, and if you want to extract anything out, feel free. Six weeks after that surgery, my back started killing me. And I go to the doc and I said, “Doc, can I get an x-ray? My back is killing me.” He's like, “Your back? What's wrong with your back?” I'm like, “I don't know, but I know back injury. I know pain.” He took the x-ray. And that's what you see there in the book. 

[00:49:52] They told me I needed a 14-hour surgery. And I remember going out in the car with my wife from that appointment and bawling like a baby. And here I am trying to save the world in the middle of the pandemic. It was 2021. I was trying to save gyms and fitness professionals and everyone I was working with. And I was crying, like “How could God do this to me? I'm a force for good. I'm trying to help people. And here I am. They tell me I need to take a year off for my life and get a 14-hour surgery. How is this possible?” I went on for like five minutes just complaining about everything. 

[00:50:29] And she said, “stop. Listen to yourself, Todd.” She goes, “Everything you've been saying and preaching for decades about how this is happening for you, not to you. Yeah, it's happening to you, but did you ever stop and think about maybe that in a year from now or two that God's going to do something with this story that's going to take you 10 times deeper and further than you can imagine right now?” And she went off on me, telling me like the stuff that I always say to people. She was telling me, I'm like, I finally said, “Timeout, stop.” Because I knew she was right, but I just didn't want to hear it at the time. 

[00:51:05] And fast forward, I went through three and a half years, Cynthia, of the darkest time of my life, because here I am. I just come out with Get Your Mind Right book get and missed in getting mine right. My mind was now wrong. And I'm trying to fight for my mindset. I'm trying to fight for my health. And physically I was a wreck and I couldn't train. And I sold a big portion of my business because I thought I was going to die. Literally, I thought I was going to die. And going through this and traversing this very interesting mental space because of my physical injury, it just proved how your psychology is affected by your physiology and your physiology is affected by your psychology. 

[00:51:48] And when I came out on the other side, finally, after the second knee replacement, the back injury, being diagnosed with sleep apnea, all within a three-and-a-half-year period. I look back now and I'm blessed because it led me to ultimately form my fitness franchise that I'm doing now. We've got seven locations nationwide and I'm really like trying to plant lighthouses across the country where faith is a big part of everything that happened to me because I didn't choose this. I didn't choose, like, I didn't want a second knee replacement. I didn't want a back injury. “I had sleep apnea, what's that? Are you kidding me?” Like, I didn't choose any of that, but now looking back to me, it's God saying, “Okay, you want to go to a different level? All right, buckle up. I'm going to help take you to a different level, but you got to have faith that this is all part of it.” 

[00:52:37] And now, a year later, that's what I've been on fire for in the crusade to go be a positive beacon of light throughout the country. That's what I'm doing, Cynthia, and that's literally because of that three-and-a-half-year period of all hell. And that's why I wrote True Strength, which was the hardest of my six books to write. Because sharing the dirt of what's not right is a lot harder than, here's the eight things that can make you a superstar trainer. All these things that are good. Well, that's, “easy.” I mean, that's just sitting down and writing that. But to share the stuff that I was called to do, because I know what like even mental health can do, because I'm the most positive person and I'm battling my own mental health. My mind ain't right. I had two young athletes that I know that I coach commit suicide during the pandemic when I was coaching them. I'm like, “That's not going to happen any longer on my watch.” I'm going to put my foot down and step forward and say, “Listen, men, women, boys and girls if you got something wrong, text me. DM me. I got it. I understand. I'm a positive guy.” 

[00:53:47] But I also know what it's like to be on the other side when you're battling and you don't want to tell anyone. You don't want to say, like, “Oh, I don't feel good. Oh, this is hurting or I'm thinking about doing this or that.” Two precious lives took their own lives during that pandemic. And now I believe that everything happened for a reason through me so that I can go be a beacon of light for other people through IMPACT-X performance and my books and the inspirational talks I'm given.

[00:54:17] Now, I realize what Melanie was saying was because this was happening for me, not to me. And I've got to have the faith and the belief that, “Okay, let's go, let's go.” 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:54:28] Well, I know--

Todd Durkin: [00:54:29] The short answer. [laughs] 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:54:29] No, no, I mean, but as I was reading your book, I, as a parent, as a spouse, all the things, I can just imagine you were going through, feeling all the feelings, and you needed to process all that to get to where you are. Even down to you being so injured that you couldn't help your oldest son move into college. And having just done that myself, I cannot even fathom, how you were feeling, because it wasn't that you didn't want to be there, as you physically could not be there to help him, but I'm so very grateful that you're now physically feeling so much better and everything is falling into place, I guess, as it was intended to be. 

[00:55:13] And I think sometimes through adversity, we have incredible opportunity, and that's really how you've shown up throughout your lifetime. I'd love for you to share with listeners how to connect with you outside of this podcast. How to purchase your newest book, True Strength. You also have Get Your Mind Right. It was fun to read. I read Get Your Mind Right first and then True Strength. And so, I was able to see how much more transparent you were in your most recent book. Really sharing, as you said, the really vulnerable stuff that allows people to realize, like, Todd is a real person. You share the good, bad and ugly about processing the pain. And for anyone who has not dealt with chronic pain issues, I mean, there is nothing else. I mean, working through the pain and trying to, like, contribute as an adult, as a spouse, as a father, I mean, that's really incredibly resilient. So, kudos to you and to your family for supporting you through that journey. 

Todd Durkin: [00:56:09] Yeah, well, thank you. To answer your question, my website, todddurkin.com, todddurkin.com. I'm on Instagram. I love Instagram and social media. Just my name, @todddurkin on that. Those are the best ways to probably reach out to me. If I'm in your area and I'm doing a talk, I'd love anyone that's listening to come on out to the talk. I will say this, Cynthia, when you're talking about that is-- And when you're going through challenge, any kind, physical, mental, it doesn't matter what kind, you don't want to usually share that. And I'm someone who during this time was working with the most elite athletes in the world. And I didn't want to tell them because I'm there to coach them and help them, and they're like, “Man, you're on fire, Todd.” And I'm like, deep down, no, I'm not on fire, but you got to battle to get through each and every day. And I always had that win the day mentality, like win today. Win that mentality of, like, “Today, I'm going to win today. And what can I do today”, but do reach out when people are struggling and battling with something because people who've been through that and been there, you read a great book or listen to a podcast like this, you're like, “Okay, I got this.” And then in six months or a year or hopefully not three and a half, but when you get through that time, you realize it was a blessing and all of this is happening for us, not just to us. And I've said that a few times, but, you know, here's a guy, you said it. And get your mind right.

[00:57:29] Now, my question is, how do you get your mind right when your mind's not right? How do you get your mind when your mind's not right? How do you get your mojo back when you know deep down you're made to be someone special, but you're not where you want to be? That's to me, when champions are born and made, and now in some of the guys and gals that I work with on the ball field and in the ring and in the octagon, it's like, this is when champions are really made, is when you're going through the tough times and you got to figure out how to get there. And to me, the last three and a half years of true strength and now coaching greatness, I mean, that's what it's all about. 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:58:06] Amazing. So good to see you, my friend. 

Todd Durkin: [00:58:09] So, great to see you, Cynthia. Thank you. 

Cynthia Thurlow: [00:58:13] If you love this podcast episode, please leave a rating and review, subscribe, and tell a friend. 

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